MBP - Most Bitched about Personality

Every office has a character which is hated universally. Mine has one too and people love hating him. He's the quintessential suckup artist, a role model for anyone who aspires to move up in the hierarchy without any sweat. If you were to describe him in one word, it would be - SUCK; his personality represents many forms of this word.
he sucks (noun) - there can't be a more inadequate and useless character than him. Infact, the only real use you can put him to is - as the baseline against which uselessness can be measured.
he sucksup (verb) - he can write a book called "million ways to flatter your boss"
he sucks (verb) - he's a parasite/leech, who thrives by sucking on the talent and hardwork of others around.
As you can imagine, portrayal of this snake needs many more posts. So in this one, I'll just attempt to list some innovative nicknames of the MBP (Most Bitched about Personality) of my office:

1. Black God - represents combination of his lovely complexion and management's imagination about His abilities
   
2. Slave/Sri Lankan Slave (of an Arab lord) - creative interpretation of an incident where a Slovak girl was chatting with MBP's colleague on a flight and was surprised to realise that MBP and his colleague were from the same country; she'd imagined MBP to be an African and his colleague an Arab. Our theory is - the girl thought that MBP was a slave following his Arab lord. Given that MBP is too short to be an African and his first onsite assignment was in Colombo for over an year, we called him "The Sri Lankan Slave"
   
3. TART - short for Technical Architect. He's the perfect example of a Dilbert strip which describes a software architect as - someone who does no real work while allegedly being very valuable
   
4. Doctor - his expert advice reminded someone of a quack sitting in a roadside tent, announcing his expertise over microphone
   
5. Fountain Of Knowledge a.k.a FOK - goes around asking silly questions and begs for an answer. After a few minutes, he barfs those answers as his own knowledge oozing out

Only 5? Guys, don't you think he deserves many more?